I am living in a soap opera.....

These last 2 weeks have been one thing after another....
My grandma died a week Friday, peaceful at last. I went to be with my family, and coped very well, probably thanks to the old meds! I seemed quite hard even to myself at some points.
I have had a pregnancy scare last week, got a faint positive, but since then had a bleed and some spotting and 2 negative hpts. Still unsure as to what is going on there, so going to test, for the last time, on Thursday unless I have a proper bleed before then. I am on the pill so it is totally unexpected and quite a scare...
After the funeral, my father took my husband out for a drink, and then they came back for tea, after which my hubby said he needed to talk to me....Asked me if I trusted him and would believe him. He then informed me that my father had 'come out' to him and told him he knew his secret because he had 'had' him before he met me! Reeling, though not as much as I should (again, thanks meds) I slept on it, believed my hubby when he said it was definatly not him as he didn't go in for that sort of thing, and he must be mistaken. He has never, ever kept anything from me, I know all about his philandering ways before he met me, and the possible child out there of his, so I have no reason to believe he would lie.
One way or another, it has come out to my sister, then my mother and the rest of the immediate family. Shock, horror, disowning, etc etc is all going on...I spoke with my father on why he had brought my hubby into his web of deceit, he is convinced it was him, despite there being no lights on, and the fact that he said he was wearing the same glasses...(my hubby got them after I convinced him 80's style were soo not right for wedding pics!) Both myself and my mum have asked if he was so sure, why did he not say when we first met? He says he knew then. But he didn't want to break up his marriage.......
Not convinced. It has been going on for years, and stopped 6 years ago, according to him. Still don't know if I believe that....
So, do you think any soap opera would be interested? Or is reality too far fetched?!.......
Just hope I get a final -ive pregnancy test now........

Trial and tribulations...

My poorly baby is still sick, bless her. Rang the emergency doctor as I was getting worried she might be getting dehydrated as she has started to refuse even the water/dyralite now. Went to see them, and they have given me a prescription for infant gaviscon powders. After getting to the chemist near us that shut at 7pm at 2 minutes to 7 and them walking out the door saying the pharmacist had already gone home, I had to go to tesco's pharmacy. So an hour later after giving her the made up gaviscon she only had a quarter, so I put some milk formula with the rest, as it did say to add it to the usual bottle of milk, to see if she would drink more. Half a bottle later she throws it all back up over us both. Quick bath down for her and me, and then I sat with her on the sofa for an hour to settle and let her sleep on me. Just brought her up to bed. Hopefully she will fare better tomorrow or it's back to the doc we go!

On another note, the 'do' I was meant to be at last night was a 'poor do' according to my other half. This was at 1am when he bounded up the stairs, switched on the bedroom light, bashed me on the arm and told me to 'get up!' and dragged me downstairs....'What have I done now?' I thought....as usually when he comes home worse for wear he gets either argumentative and verbally vicious or morose...He wanted a dance....1am, I had just dropped off after a tough day, and HE wants to dance! I suppose I should be grateful though, he said he had really missed me not being there and really wanted a dance with me and to tell me he loved me as he 'doesn't say it enough.' aawwwwww....

Scary!

This is the email my kind brother passed on to me. My 1st reaction was to laugh and think of the reply, 'when did you get mum to pose for that?!' when it hit me...that could be me now...

Ok, maybe my ass is not that big yet (or am I being kind to myself?) but the rest...yep pretty much me. Anyone got a cure for comfort eating? Anyone? Hoping the happy pills would stop my evening munchies...hhhmmmmmm...nope not happened yet...

So, will have to get off my big butt and start going on my exercise thingy (bit like a bike but with no seat...I wish it had a seat...) again and try fight the munchie monster. Easier said than done, especially on dark cold nights with no other half to keep me in check...though he does like tubs of pringles and bottles of wine on an evening...

'I love you'....

'I love you mummy' - this is the phrase my son has taken to saying, oh, 3 or 4 times a day...
Should I be rejoicing at having a wonderfully giving, loving child? Or worrying that there is something wrong that every day he has to tell me he loves me?
What a world we live in when the simplest joys become reasons to worry!

On another note, the other half did recognise a difference to the front room, 'oh you have had a big change around...how did you manage it?'....because obviously I am a woman and I can't possibly move the odd display cabinet, music chest, and table around! And now, all my wonderful effort has become a messy room again. I swear, the biggest mess is always created when he is at home! 3 days I kept it tidy...within hours it was a bomb site!

Oh well, going to go clean it up I suppose....or should I leave it for him to do....!?

And before the day is over....

Well, I did rearrange my front room...and I have aches and pains to show for it! It was good to get it all done though, mind to say I started at 10.30am, broke off for lunch and school run, feeding the kids and getting them to bed, yes bed, I didn't get finished until gone 8pm! That was some spring clean! Hope my other half appreciates it when he gets back from his trip!

And speaking of other half's, when they say something that really gets you, but you know if you say anything they will just act as if you are mad for saying anything, should you bother in the first place?

This is my quandary....As you may have seen from my profile (if you have looked) I have been through a few traumas in my life. The latest one, we went for compensation. Now, before anyone goes mad at me, it was the 2nd time I had been placed in a life threatening situation by the same hospital, the first time we let it go, being of the mind you don't take from the nhs, but the 2nd time, well, lets just say being aware of intubation and staring at the surgeon as they prepare to cut you open kind of makes you go a little crazy... anyway, they have come back with an apology, a promise that it has been brought up at this meeting and that meeting and procedure will be changed, and a figure, which we have accepted. What got to me was the comment 'nice £££ for a little discomfort' . LITTLE DISCOMFORT?!!!!! But I said nothing...would you have? Is this a sign that,
a) I know him too well to bother with a response
b) We are 'comfortable' in our relationship
c) we are heading for divorce
d) I have given up the fight and don't care who says what to me anymore?
Anyway, it's too late to change it now.

Well, I really should head off to bed, and I do feel better for getting that off my chest.

Thanks and goodnight x