The school holidays began on Wednesday, only on my 3rd day....only 38 more to go! So far so good! Mind you, hubby is off for two weeks so the last two mornings he has got up and sorted them out with breakfast etc while I got a lie in! Am I fortunate or what?! Really must pull my weight though and start getting up early. Off to go get a pool later for the kids as last years has a hole in it and a rip down the side! They are down in the garden bouncing on a mini bouncy castle ring at the moment, though I think the red dye is coming off and going all over the kids! Oh well, it's all part of the fun!
I have increased my meds again, taking 2 10mg tablets until I get to see the doc sometime next week and make sure it is ok to up them again. 10mg just wasn't working. I was going downhill again and just wondered why I was trying to get off them when I clearly was a train wreak without them. Ok, so I am no saint on them, still have my moments, and they do take away a lot of stuff, go round in a bit of a haze sometimes, but that has got to be better than struggling to get out of bed and do anything at all and feeling what is the point of it all?
Seeing my councillor now, had 2 sessions, got another one next Wednesday. So far so good. feel a little stupid sometimes, as it seems that I know what I need to be doing to feel better in myself, just doing it that is a problem! And when she asks questions, I seem to go blank, my memory is sooo bad! I got a little upset last session, feeling a little worthless, which came across quite stupid as I was saying how I seemed void of all emotion! We have some great kids, and I just feel everyone says you are doing a great job, but I don't think I am, or could be, if that makes sense?
Anyway, speaking of doing a great job, I really should get them dressed and sort out some lunch!
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