Up visiting family for the holidays. Managing to get out of bed and put on a face, most of the time. Had a big bust up in the family, got upset over it all, and wondered what is the point of trying anymore. Life is just crap. Mum isn't going to change. She blames my hubby for everything! Never mind that her hubby is the one who goes out looking for cock and calls her too fat to fancy! Nooo, my hubby should never have told me, he should have kept it to himself and told her only!!! WTF!
Feel like I am getting further and further away from them all, even to the point of thinking if anything ever went wrong with me and hubby I wouldn't want to move back here. Can' t be doing with all the hassle and this and that and who did/said what.
Mum is back with dad. Divorce off. Not moving back here though. I think she wants him to move away with her somewhere, but he won't as his work/friends/lifestyle is here. My sister is getting further away and in her own world. Still uncertain of weather she is after another man, my sister thinks she is only staying with her hubby because she couldn't cope with the kids on her own, and loves her youngest too much to leave them behind. My other sister is just coping and getting on with life, still trying to have a baby, but getting nowhere. I think they may start to think about adoption if she doesn't get any more help with ovulating etc.
We are heading back home tomorrow, had enough. Mum is staying with dad and coming back on the train. Tablets will hopefully kick in soon and I will get some motivation to get off my butt and clean the house, sort out the rubbish, and get on top of things. And as my youngest starts nursery next week, I'll have 2 1/2 hours to get things done! just hope I can make the most of it, and hope to get back to the gym. Haven't been this month :(
Right, off to switch the rubbish off tv and go to bed and try get some sleep....
Monday 28 December 2009
Tuesday 15 December 2009
And it's all change again!!!
Yep, you guessed it. Divorce is back on! Mum is staying put. Will it last?!
Went to the doc and got increase on my meds, now 40mg and waiting to see a councillor. Been 5 days now... still not getting up and for the last two nights not been getting to sleep before 3am! Haven't been to the gym for over a week now. Didn't make my Aqua fit class. Just couldn't face anything. Feeling a little better, then wonder if I really was that bad? Then can't get up or motivated again! So up and down like a roller coaster!
Well, short and brief, got to sort out a crying toddler!
Went to the doc and got increase on my meds, now 40mg and waiting to see a councillor. Been 5 days now... still not getting up and for the last two nights not been getting to sleep before 3am! Haven't been to the gym for over a week now. Didn't make my Aqua fit class. Just couldn't face anything. Feeling a little better, then wonder if I really was that bad? Then can't get up or motivated again! So up and down like a roller coaster!
Well, short and brief, got to sort out a crying toddler!
Monday 7 December 2009
Hit a rough patch
Last week, well probably for the past fortnight, I seem to have been going downhill steadily. Not wanting to go out, sleeping in as long as I can, though I have been doing that for a good month or so now...so maybe it's been longer than the last two weeks?
Still on my tablets, taking 20mg all the time now instead of going down to 10mg when it's not totm. And I don't know if it is really doing anything, or helping. Should really go see the doc again, but can't get motivated to do it. It would mean getting out of bed early...
I have been going to the gym now for a month, trying to go 3 times a week, hoping that would help lift my mood. I do get motivated to go, and have done an Aqua swim lesson, booked in again this week, so it means getting up and ready at 8am, and I can do it, so why don't I do it every morning?
Thought I was heading for a breakdown again last week, just crazy thoughts in my head, of 'I can't do this anymore' going over and over and over again, freezing and staring off thinking 'I can't move, I can't move' and really wondering if I should book myself into a phsyc ward! But then thought, no, if I am thinking that I must have some sanity! Seems to have eased off a bit, not getting those thoughts, but still wondering if they will come back worse? If that makes any sence? Not really with it.
Mum is getting ready to move back up North, off in Febuary as she can't give notice on her flat, and has to be there until the lease is up. She has given a load of her stuff to a couple who are getting married next year, going to sell a couple of bits on ebay, and the rest will got to the charity shop. I have (or will) gained a deep fat fryer, a microwave/oven and a small tv and dvd player for my sons room! Oh and a set top box. One sister is gutted because she has sold the washing machine and she wanted it! Which reminds me, I am also getting the dryer! So I haven't done too bad I suppose!
Ok, think that's my moan for this week. Off to go sort out some tea, or get a takeaway as everyone is out at Panto!
Still on my tablets, taking 20mg all the time now instead of going down to 10mg when it's not totm. And I don't know if it is really doing anything, or helping. Should really go see the doc again, but can't get motivated to do it. It would mean getting out of bed early...
I have been going to the gym now for a month, trying to go 3 times a week, hoping that would help lift my mood. I do get motivated to go, and have done an Aqua swim lesson, booked in again this week, so it means getting up and ready at 8am, and I can do it, so why don't I do it every morning?
Thought I was heading for a breakdown again last week, just crazy thoughts in my head, of 'I can't do this anymore' going over and over and over again, freezing and staring off thinking 'I can't move, I can't move' and really wondering if I should book myself into a phsyc ward! But then thought, no, if I am thinking that I must have some sanity! Seems to have eased off a bit, not getting those thoughts, but still wondering if they will come back worse? If that makes any sence? Not really with it.
Mum is getting ready to move back up North, off in Febuary as she can't give notice on her flat, and has to be there until the lease is up. She has given a load of her stuff to a couple who are getting married next year, going to sell a couple of bits on ebay, and the rest will got to the charity shop. I have (or will) gained a deep fat fryer, a microwave/oven and a small tv and dvd player for my sons room! Oh and a set top box. One sister is gutted because she has sold the washing machine and she wanted it! Which reminds me, I am also getting the dryer! So I haven't done too bad I suppose!
Ok, think that's my moan for this week. Off to go sort out some tea, or get a takeaway as everyone is out at Panto!
Monday 23 November 2009
Ok, Guess the news.....
I bet you can! Though I am totally dumb! And mad!
We went up to see the new arrival, and mum asked if she could come up with us, 'not to see your dad, I want to see the kids/grand kids' - OK.
So, she stays downstairs, we are upstairs, we get there late Friday night and hubby goes out to see Alfie... on his own (kind of knew he would want to but still felt a bit put out. Though it is his daughter/grandchild and nothing really to do with me as that is the kind of relationship we have, not really a step mum relationship, just his dad's wife.) Next day, we all go, bar mum who is going out. Find out when I get back, yep, she has gone out to lunch with my dad....?!?!?!
Everyone knew that was why she came up, except it seems me who is so trusting and actually believed she didn't want to see him, after telling me only 5 days before she was going for a divorce again! Why do I always get suckered in? Had a good night out with the girls that night, got home reasonably early at 1.45am, but after getting my sister in after falling over 4 times then falling flat again in the flat, we eventually got to eat our pizza - by this time cold, and then after her partner went to bed in disgust (at the state she was in! She couldn't even remember going to my mum before we came upstairs and getting right in her face saying 'mum, do you really love dad? REALLY love him? do you?!' as we drag her off upstairs!) we were talking rubbish, my sister telling me she could see so much sadness in my eyes and why didn't I just let it all out? Eventually got away to bed at 4am! ARGH! So I didn't get much sleep! Saw Alfie again, took loads of pics, and then we set off back home.
Today, mum has told me she is moving back in with my dad.....I sit and shake my head as I type this....I think I really should just wash my hands of it all. Think about getting some training and emigrating! Best off away from it all? She is giving notice on her flat and will be off up in January. Said that part of what has held her back is the fact me and the kids will not be up there.... well thanks for that! Will I fall for it again if she ends up changing her mind? How much rope do you give your mum? How long do you keep being there to pick up the pieces?
Alfie really is a lovely baby. So good for her too. She seems to be doing very well too. I always wondered how on earth I would cope on my own, but if I had a baby like she has and no PND I would probably have been alright! I did at one point think this could have been our baby, looking back when she first said she was pregnant, and hubby wanted her to get an abortion and I said I would rather she had it and we brought it up than that, though that was never a plan as she wanted him. Next visit, 4 weeks!
We went up to see the new arrival, and mum asked if she could come up with us, 'not to see your dad, I want to see the kids/grand kids' - OK.
So, she stays downstairs, we are upstairs, we get there late Friday night and hubby goes out to see Alfie... on his own (kind of knew he would want to but still felt a bit put out. Though it is his daughter/grandchild and nothing really to do with me as that is the kind of relationship we have, not really a step mum relationship, just his dad's wife.) Next day, we all go, bar mum who is going out. Find out when I get back, yep, she has gone out to lunch with my dad....?!?!?!
Everyone knew that was why she came up, except it seems me who is so trusting and actually believed she didn't want to see him, after telling me only 5 days before she was going for a divorce again! Why do I always get suckered in? Had a good night out with the girls that night, got home reasonably early at 1.45am, but after getting my sister in after falling over 4 times then falling flat again in the flat, we eventually got to eat our pizza - by this time cold, and then after her partner went to bed in disgust (at the state she was in! She couldn't even remember going to my mum before we came upstairs and getting right in her face saying 'mum, do you really love dad? REALLY love him? do you?!' as we drag her off upstairs!) we were talking rubbish, my sister telling me she could see so much sadness in my eyes and why didn't I just let it all out? Eventually got away to bed at 4am! ARGH! So I didn't get much sleep! Saw Alfie again, took loads of pics, and then we set off back home.
Today, mum has told me she is moving back in with my dad.....I sit and shake my head as I type this....I think I really should just wash my hands of it all. Think about getting some training and emigrating! Best off away from it all? She is giving notice on her flat and will be off up in January. Said that part of what has held her back is the fact me and the kids will not be up there.... well thanks for that! Will I fall for it again if she ends up changing her mind? How much rope do you give your mum? How long do you keep being there to pick up the pieces?
Alfie really is a lovely baby. So good for her too. She seems to be doing very well too. I always wondered how on earth I would cope on my own, but if I had a baby like she has and no PND I would probably have been alright! I did at one point think this could have been our baby, looking back when she first said she was pregnant, and hubby wanted her to get an abortion and I said I would rather she had it and we brought it up than that, though that was never a plan as she wanted him. Next visit, 4 weeks!
Wednesday 18 November 2009
Topsy turvy
That's my life right now. All over the place.
Full of cold, feel crap, came on and want to sleep for England. Mum is 'off' dad again, 'he isn't going to change' ~ er, we've been telling you that for ages! Lets see how long that lasts eh?!
On a positive note, I have joined a gym (free! YAY!) and I am going to get myself sorted out! Been twice so far, and then got a cold so haven't been for a couple of days! Waiting to get back though so that must be good right? I am hoping to go 3 times a week to start, and build up. Should help on many fronts, moods, weight, fitness....
I am now a step-grandma....though don't call myself that as I don't really feel like a step-mum! Hubby's daughter gave birth Sunday, after going into labour Saturday afternoon. All I got from hubby was poor thing's had a hard time of it, going all this time, she's worn out bla-de-bla and all I could think was, yes, and when I gave birth to our son I was in labour for the same length of time too you know! Is that jealousy? I didn't say anything, as it would have seemed petty, but I still felt it! Ah well, he's here now, safe and well. Still have to go see him, though I was 'told off' for announcing on facebook that hubby was now a grandad! (Hence why I don't feel remotely part of all of this! I mean, why would MY family want to know, right?!!!) Ha, so much for controlling my anger! haha! Put it down to pmt! Being full of cold we probably won't get up there until next week now. And I am partly can't wait to see him, and partly, will I just be in the way, not involved etc etc....
And then, to add to it, hubby's eldest who is living with us went into hospital on Monday with suspected Asthma and acute bronchitis! He's still in there now. I asked if they told him to stop smoking, and hubby just said what has that got to do with it?! I told him it probably caused it! But he said he's too young to have it from that, it's just an infection, despite the fact their mother smoked all her life and then he started at about 17! But then hubby thinks the big 'smoking kills' is all a load of tosh! He knows loads of people who smoke and are fine! (His mum being someone who is held together by nicotine!) Anyway, we shall see what happens when he gets out.
As for me, just wish this could would go now, so I could get things done, get on top of things, cleaning/ironing etc. And get on with life.
Full of cold, feel crap, came on and want to sleep for England. Mum is 'off' dad again, 'he isn't going to change' ~ er, we've been telling you that for ages! Lets see how long that lasts eh?!
On a positive note, I have joined a gym (free! YAY!) and I am going to get myself sorted out! Been twice so far, and then got a cold so haven't been for a couple of days! Waiting to get back though so that must be good right? I am hoping to go 3 times a week to start, and build up. Should help on many fronts, moods, weight, fitness....
I am now a step-grandma....though don't call myself that as I don't really feel like a step-mum! Hubby's daughter gave birth Sunday, after going into labour Saturday afternoon. All I got from hubby was poor thing's had a hard time of it, going all this time, she's worn out bla-de-bla and all I could think was, yes, and when I gave birth to our son I was in labour for the same length of time too you know! Is that jealousy? I didn't say anything, as it would have seemed petty, but I still felt it! Ah well, he's here now, safe and well. Still have to go see him, though I was 'told off' for announcing on facebook that hubby was now a grandad! (Hence why I don't feel remotely part of all of this! I mean, why would MY family want to know, right?!!!) Ha, so much for controlling my anger! haha! Put it down to pmt! Being full of cold we probably won't get up there until next week now. And I am partly can't wait to see him, and partly, will I just be in the way, not involved etc etc....
And then, to add to it, hubby's eldest who is living with us went into hospital on Monday with suspected Asthma and acute bronchitis! He's still in there now. I asked if they told him to stop smoking, and hubby just said what has that got to do with it?! I told him it probably caused it! But he said he's too young to have it from that, it's just an infection, despite the fact their mother smoked all her life and then he started at about 17! But then hubby thinks the big 'smoking kills' is all a load of tosh! He knows loads of people who smoke and are fine! (His mum being someone who is held together by nicotine!) Anyway, we shall see what happens when he gets out.
As for me, just wish this could would go now, so I could get things done, get on top of things, cleaning/ironing etc. And get on with life.
Saturday 31 October 2009
2nd RANT
Still mad, though calmed down a little...only a little mind you!
So, told hubby, who just laughed. He said it would be interesting to see if dad wanted to see the kids this weekend, I said there's no chance of that! I still am in shock, two weeks ago she wanted to die because of this man, and now that is all supposed to be forgiven and forgotten and lets get on with it again?! Was it all just to get him to come running back to her? (well, you have to wonder!) In her counselling sessions, what she did speak to me about anyway, when she was 'inside' they told her he was making it pretty obvious that he wanted either his cake and eat it, or out of it all together! And she agreed, and coming to terms with this fact was part of her rehabilitation...so what is she doing!?! Playing the system? Totally madly and crazily in love with the man? I know they have 'been together for 35 years' (it would have been their anniversary this Tuesday gone and she spent the day seeing councillors then at our house overnight!!!) but that still does not get away from the fact that he is a total low life cheating bastard who likes dick! ARghhhgggggghhhh!!!!!!!
ok, breath....
I just can't understand it. I really can't. Is it just me? I could never live with that....ever.
Then I think about what I have been through, but it is no comparison to them. I don't feel like a hypocrite for staying, my hubby has never cheated on me, let alone gone round with any tom dick or harry! We have our problems, and maybe that is why I would be straight out that door if he ever ever cheated, no matter what excuse. But I just can't see it from her point....
Phew, calmed down a touch now...
And this is going to ruin her wanting to get back on good ground with 2 of her kids, one who really has totally disowned her I think, and the other who only will speak to her if she calls, and doesn't want to know what is going on with her anymore... when they found out about the 'suicidal' incident, which they found out from my dad because mum rang and told him?! (WTF AGAIN!!!) they had no sympathy, and said it was all just a ploy, and maybe they're right....
Why do we have to have such mixed up parents?!
So, told hubby, who just laughed. He said it would be interesting to see if dad wanted to see the kids this weekend, I said there's no chance of that! I still am in shock, two weeks ago she wanted to die because of this man, and now that is all supposed to be forgiven and forgotten and lets get on with it again?! Was it all just to get him to come running back to her? (well, you have to wonder!) In her counselling sessions, what she did speak to me about anyway, when she was 'inside' they told her he was making it pretty obvious that he wanted either his cake and eat it, or out of it all together! And she agreed, and coming to terms with this fact was part of her rehabilitation...so what is she doing!?! Playing the system? Totally madly and crazily in love with the man? I know they have 'been together for 35 years' (it would have been their anniversary this Tuesday gone and she spent the day seeing councillors then at our house overnight!!!) but that still does not get away from the fact that he is a total low life cheating bastard who likes dick! ARghhhgggggghhhh!!!!!!!
ok, breath....
I just can't understand it. I really can't. Is it just me? I could never live with that....ever.
Then I think about what I have been through, but it is no comparison to them. I don't feel like a hypocrite for staying, my hubby has never cheated on me, let alone gone round with any tom dick or harry! We have our problems, and maybe that is why I would be straight out that door if he ever ever cheated, no matter what excuse. But I just can't see it from her point....
Phew, calmed down a touch now...
And this is going to ruin her wanting to get back on good ground with 2 of her kids, one who really has totally disowned her I think, and the other who only will speak to her if she calls, and doesn't want to know what is going on with her anymore... when they found out about the 'suicidal' incident, which they found out from my dad because mum rang and told him?! (WTF AGAIN!!!) they had no sympathy, and said it was all just a ploy, and maybe they're right....
Why do we have to have such mixed up parents?!
Friday 30 October 2009
Soooo Mad!!!
ARGGGGHHHH!
She has done it again! Made me mad. How can one woman be soooo stupid! Ignorant? Devious? ARghhhh!
I have to come on here because she doesn't want anyone else to know, so I can't vent anywhere else, though could tell hubby, who would just say I told you so....and that would be it!
She is seeing my dad, he's coming down for the weekend. He (or she/he?!) has ended their 'friendship' and he wants no part of his 'former lifestyle'. WTF! (yep, that's right, she has even got me cursing!) So, she is 'still his wife' as she told me when she told me today, and has had lots of good advice from people (though no one knows?!? WTF AGAIN!) and is going to see how it goes, and he wants to change, and they, 'if we did eventually get back together for good' would move somewhere completely different, away from everyone/thing that reminds them of their/his history.
ARRRRRRRRRHHHHHH! Suicide watch is over. She was out in 2 days, but being seen daily and called, but they signed off on her last week, to see the gp and get a personal phsycologist, to go through CBT. So she is on longer a 'worry'. ...... HMMMMM!!!!
Going for tea, instalment two later.....
She has done it again! Made me mad. How can one woman be soooo stupid! Ignorant? Devious? ARghhhh!
I have to come on here because she doesn't want anyone else to know, so I can't vent anywhere else, though could tell hubby, who would just say I told you so....and that would be it!
She is seeing my dad, he's coming down for the weekend. He (or she/he?!) has ended their 'friendship' and he wants no part of his 'former lifestyle'. WTF! (yep, that's right, she has even got me cursing!) So, she is 'still his wife' as she told me when she told me today, and has had lots of good advice from people (though no one knows?!? WTF AGAIN!) and is going to see how it goes, and he wants to change, and they, 'if we did eventually get back together for good' would move somewhere completely different, away from everyone/thing that reminds them of their/his history.
ARRRRRRRRRHHHHHH! Suicide watch is over. She was out in 2 days, but being seen daily and called, but they signed off on her last week, to see the gp and get a personal phsycologist, to go through CBT. So she is on longer a 'worry'. ...... HMMMMM!!!!
Going for tea, instalment two later.....
Tuesday 13 October 2009
Longest time between posts....
So much has happened.
Stepson now home and in the old laundry room, he was quite happy to go in there and as he arrived whilst I was visiting family, they got on with sorting it out for him so that is where he lives! Don't see much of him, as he spends most of his time in there! Has been useful though for when we needed an immediate babysitter!
Family visit....well, wish I hadn't stayed so long, just short of two weeks and I was sooo glad to get back home! I felt in the way, torn between mum/rest of the family, as they are all against her but feel sorry for my dad? Apart from my brother who still can't stand him, but doesn't have time for her either! Bit sad really, as they seem to blame her, came out with a lot of stuff etc that made me think about her differently and wish they hadn't, though she is still my mum, drives me potty, but I still love her to bits.
Speaking of mum, she is currently in the Mental Health Unit at the local hospital. Got a call to take her to the docs yesterday, which I felt put out by at the time, as it was tea time, and was just getting shopping in, but having a live-in baby sitter, I went and took her. She didn't say why she was going, but when she went in the nurse asked why she was down...so guessed what was going on... She was referred to psychologist at the A & E dept, so spent over an hour waiting to be seen, then got moved to the MHU and then I went to get her some night clothes, medications and bits, with the assumption that she would be home possibly today. They are keeping her in another night, but looks like she will be out tomorrow, and referred to GP to see the health team, why they can't sort all this out in there I don't know! She said today when I took more clothes up that the Psychologist had told her basically to buck up, there were worse people than her out there and she had to go home and face it....! Hmmmmm strange psychology to me to someone who wants to kill themselves! Anyway, not letting anyone else know, as they would be of the same opinion as my hubby that it is all for attention. But then, if it is, why not give the attention?! Just don't get it myself! As he says, if you are going to kill yourself just get on with it and don't faff....that's his psychology!
I think it is all hitting her. She was up looking after dad who got swine flu about a month back now, and when he was better he was off out, living his life, leaving her in, until she came home. They had talked about her moving back, but he admitted he didn't really want that, and that his relationship with the he/she meant more to him than her. He spends most of his time with and talking about her, even to mum, that she has finally taken the hint, and it has hurt her to think he spends the time with he/she that he never spent with her. She decided to go for divorce again, but is waiting for him to commit adultery again (!) which he basically admitted wouldn't take long.... Plus, she rang my brother to arrange to see her grandson, she says he never got back to her, he says she never bothered, top and bottom of it is she feels she will never see him. so that added to it all, and she thinks one sister won't talk to her, which in a way is kind of true, she will talk to her, but only if needed, and only basic stuff. My sister says she is 'cutting the bad' out of her life, including mum and dad, though she spends more time with him.... So this is where we are....limbo land. My aunt knows what is going on, as she was the one who told my mum to go to the doc as she was really worried about her.
Me, well, I am just coasting along really. Full of cold at the minute, which doesn't help with trying to get stuff done, have a mountain of washing from being away, and then all this, house is a bomb site, and I don't seem to get anything done! Still on the meds, probably why I am coasting through it all! Step daughter is due to drop in 3 weeks too, so will be off up North again soon! Still sleeping in most days, but with cold, that is my excuse! I have got up when we have been away, so I know I can do it, though I yawn all day! Oh, and another 'It could only happen to me' moments happened last week!
I went for my urology test, to check my bladder function. After getting there 10 mins late (not my fault, got stuck at the level crossing for 7 mins, then drove round the hospital car park for nearly 10 mins!) she said they would see me as they allowed 10 mins, and I had 'just' made it! Cheek! So go in, saying she has to rush etc and fills out the forms and goes to log it on the computer, when there is a power cut! Comes on again in a minute though so she re-boots, it hasn't saved so she starts again, bang, another one! She looked at me and said it is going to be one of those days! Anyway a student doc then arrives and asked if he could observe, I had no problem with it, with having 2 babies and umpteen examinations, nothing fazes me now (oh, and another one, whilst on holiday in Denmark, we went swimming----they don't allow showering in a costume! So they are all there, letting it all hang out, and I thought well, if they can do it, then why shouldn't I? ... haha! How brave...or naive? am I!) So, I digress, I pee in the chair that checks how much I do and how my flow goes (!) then they come back in and insert 2 catheters...one in vagina and one in urethra (?) then fill my bladder with saline. Very strange sensation! As it fills they sit me up and see if I leek...nope. So stand up, then I cough, and leek, then as she is filling my bladder I have to say when I get the 1st urge to pee, then when I would pee if at home, then when I would be rushing to find a toilet when out shopping,. and finally when I was bursting and had to go NOW! All the time she has me coughing between them. So, I get to the 3rd one and start to feel sick, I say 'can I sit down I feel sick, and she lowered me onto the potty, only for me to pass out! Next thing I am being dragged out of strange dream to sounds of 'you're ok, come on, are you there?' and there are about 6 people all around. They get me on the bed, put on a fan, and I start to realise what has happened and come round! She says she has never made anyone pass out before and she isn't going to live it down all day! They checked my blood sugar levels, as the only time I had felt the same was when I was pregnant and had a hypo, but it was fine, so they put it down to rushing around! I told the student doc, if anything was going to go wrong it would do with me! Thankfully, she said I didn't have to go through the test again, she had all the info she needed! PHEW!!! So, my bladder is fine, my bowel is slightly prolapsed through (?) which could be a small reason for the stress incontinence. So now I wait to see the consultant again and where we go from here, though I would not want surgery after my last time in theatre!
So, that's all ...wow, two months....what more can happen this year....?!
Stepson now home and in the old laundry room, he was quite happy to go in there and as he arrived whilst I was visiting family, they got on with sorting it out for him so that is where he lives! Don't see much of him, as he spends most of his time in there! Has been useful though for when we needed an immediate babysitter!
Family visit....well, wish I hadn't stayed so long, just short of two weeks and I was sooo glad to get back home! I felt in the way, torn between mum/rest of the family, as they are all against her but feel sorry for my dad? Apart from my brother who still can't stand him, but doesn't have time for her either! Bit sad really, as they seem to blame her, came out with a lot of stuff etc that made me think about her differently and wish they hadn't, though she is still my mum, drives me potty, but I still love her to bits.
Speaking of mum, she is currently in the Mental Health Unit at the local hospital. Got a call to take her to the docs yesterday, which I felt put out by at the time, as it was tea time, and was just getting shopping in, but having a live-in baby sitter, I went and took her. She didn't say why she was going, but when she went in the nurse asked why she was down...so guessed what was going on... She was referred to psychologist at the A & E dept, so spent over an hour waiting to be seen, then got moved to the MHU and then I went to get her some night clothes, medications and bits, with the assumption that she would be home possibly today. They are keeping her in another night, but looks like she will be out tomorrow, and referred to GP to see the health team, why they can't sort all this out in there I don't know! She said today when I took more clothes up that the Psychologist had told her basically to buck up, there were worse people than her out there and she had to go home and face it....! Hmmmmm strange psychology to me to someone who wants to kill themselves! Anyway, not letting anyone else know, as they would be of the same opinion as my hubby that it is all for attention. But then, if it is, why not give the attention?! Just don't get it myself! As he says, if you are going to kill yourself just get on with it and don't faff....that's his psychology!
I think it is all hitting her. She was up looking after dad who got swine flu about a month back now, and when he was better he was off out, living his life, leaving her in, until she came home. They had talked about her moving back, but he admitted he didn't really want that, and that his relationship with the he/she meant more to him than her. He spends most of his time with and talking about her, even to mum, that she has finally taken the hint, and it has hurt her to think he spends the time with he/she that he never spent with her. She decided to go for divorce again, but is waiting for him to commit adultery again (!) which he basically admitted wouldn't take long.... Plus, she rang my brother to arrange to see her grandson, she says he never got back to her, he says she never bothered, top and bottom of it is she feels she will never see him. so that added to it all, and she thinks one sister won't talk to her, which in a way is kind of true, she will talk to her, but only if needed, and only basic stuff. My sister says she is 'cutting the bad' out of her life, including mum and dad, though she spends more time with him.... So this is where we are....limbo land. My aunt knows what is going on, as she was the one who told my mum to go to the doc as she was really worried about her.
Me, well, I am just coasting along really. Full of cold at the minute, which doesn't help with trying to get stuff done, have a mountain of washing from being away, and then all this, house is a bomb site, and I don't seem to get anything done! Still on the meds, probably why I am coasting through it all! Step daughter is due to drop in 3 weeks too, so will be off up North again soon! Still sleeping in most days, but with cold, that is my excuse! I have got up when we have been away, so I know I can do it, though I yawn all day! Oh, and another 'It could only happen to me' moments happened last week!
I went for my urology test, to check my bladder function. After getting there 10 mins late (not my fault, got stuck at the level crossing for 7 mins, then drove round the hospital car park for nearly 10 mins!) she said they would see me as they allowed 10 mins, and I had 'just' made it! Cheek! So go in, saying she has to rush etc and fills out the forms and goes to log it on the computer, when there is a power cut! Comes on again in a minute though so she re-boots, it hasn't saved so she starts again, bang, another one! She looked at me and said it is going to be one of those days! Anyway a student doc then arrives and asked if he could observe, I had no problem with it, with having 2 babies and umpteen examinations, nothing fazes me now (oh, and another one, whilst on holiday in Denmark, we went swimming----they don't allow showering in a costume! So they are all there, letting it all hang out, and I thought well, if they can do it, then why shouldn't I? ... haha! How brave...or naive? am I!) So, I digress, I pee in the chair that checks how much I do and how my flow goes (!) then they come back in and insert 2 catheters...one in vagina and one in urethra (?) then fill my bladder with saline. Very strange sensation! As it fills they sit me up and see if I leek...nope. So stand up, then I cough, and leek, then as she is filling my bladder I have to say when I get the 1st urge to pee, then when I would pee if at home, then when I would be rushing to find a toilet when out shopping,. and finally when I was bursting and had to go NOW! All the time she has me coughing between them. So, I get to the 3rd one and start to feel sick, I say 'can I sit down I feel sick, and she lowered me onto the potty, only for me to pass out! Next thing I am being dragged out of strange dream to sounds of 'you're ok, come on, are you there?' and there are about 6 people all around. They get me on the bed, put on a fan, and I start to realise what has happened and come round! She says she has never made anyone pass out before and she isn't going to live it down all day! They checked my blood sugar levels, as the only time I had felt the same was when I was pregnant and had a hypo, but it was fine, so they put it down to rushing around! I told the student doc, if anything was going to go wrong it would do with me! Thankfully, she said I didn't have to go through the test again, she had all the info she needed! PHEW!!! So, my bladder is fine, my bowel is slightly prolapsed through (?) which could be a small reason for the stress incontinence. So now I wait to see the consultant again and where we go from here, though I would not want surgery after my last time in theatre!
So, that's all ...wow, two months....what more can happen this year....?!
Saturday 8 August 2009
Month passes.....
And not much different! Mum still seeing dad, going to go up once a month and see how it goes. She has just renewed her contract for another 6 months down here, so seems to be staying put, for now. Still says she couldn't live with him...but can't live without him....?!
We are off up to visit the rest of the family next week...looking forward to seeing them! And my step-son is coming back to England to live again, moving in with us and applying for jobs in London. So don't know how long it will be for. I cleaned out the laundry room yesterday to see if we could make it his room, but it is too small and noisy with the boiler and stuff in there. So we are looking to get a cheap caravan to put in the back garden! That or put our two in one room and he has the other! Just need the cash now!!
Hubby working two jobs, and totally worn out most days. Yet still pushes himself. Bills, mortgages, loans, cards....then there's his daughter who is pregnant and due end of November who has just found somewhere to rent, so he's subsidising that until it's born and she gets it all paid for! So we scrape by, as everyone is I suppose.
My sister, who went off the rails, seems to be flirting again...on facebook. Don't know if she is intentional or naive! Though my sister who lives above her thinks she may be heading for trouble! I will see when I go up to stay. Just wish she would realise what she has! And my other sister is now not talking to my mum! Yet will still talk to my dad!?! Don't get it, though she blames it on things in the past, how we were brought up and she felt unloved compared to how mum loved dad...think we grew up in different families the way she goes on sometimes! We probably just all have different recollections of things.
Right, that's it for now, got to go bath the kids then sort out our tea. And try get my head in order!
We are off up to visit the rest of the family next week...looking forward to seeing them! And my step-son is coming back to England to live again, moving in with us and applying for jobs in London. So don't know how long it will be for. I cleaned out the laundry room yesterday to see if we could make it his room, but it is too small and noisy with the boiler and stuff in there. So we are looking to get a cheap caravan to put in the back garden! That or put our two in one room and he has the other! Just need the cash now!!
Hubby working two jobs, and totally worn out most days. Yet still pushes himself. Bills, mortgages, loans, cards....then there's his daughter who is pregnant and due end of November who has just found somewhere to rent, so he's subsidising that until it's born and she gets it all paid for! So we scrape by, as everyone is I suppose.
My sister, who went off the rails, seems to be flirting again...on facebook. Don't know if she is intentional or naive! Though my sister who lives above her thinks she may be heading for trouble! I will see when I go up to stay. Just wish she would realise what she has! And my other sister is now not talking to my mum! Yet will still talk to my dad!?! Don't get it, though she blames it on things in the past, how we were brought up and she felt unloved compared to how mum loved dad...think we grew up in different families the way she goes on sometimes! We probably just all have different recollections of things.
Right, that's it for now, got to go bath the kids then sort out our tea. And try get my head in order!
Friday 10 July 2009
This may take a while....
So, where do I begin?!
Flat was sold...stc, last week, hurrah! Then my dad was going on about getting a solicitor, as he didn't think he should be giving mum any from it as it was left to him in his dad's will.....Then he wanted to get back with her, though admitted he felt more for he/she (was a man, op, now woman) than he did for her.
After a rough week, and one where she has being saying it was the right thing to do, move here, settled, and getting on with life, the flat selling like it did when there are 5 other flats in the building that have been on the market far longer, she rang last night to say she was going up to see him....and probably will stay with him. The divorce is off again. The flat sale is on hold as the woman is ill. She still loves him....WHAT???!!!!???? I told her she is mad, she said everyone says she is but she still loves him, the man who has cheated countless times on her, who goes out and gets his kicks cottaging, who admitted he feels more for a he/she who has no sex drive, who only wants her for her benefit money! ARGHH!! It makes me sick and mad. I was so cross with her last night after she called.
I was supposed to take her to the station this morning, and was going early so I could talk to her, see what was going on in her head, but on the way home from taking my son to school the car broke down! So RAC came out, and it started straight away! TYPICAL! He did a check, and something was flashing as having an error, so he went to open bonnet and couldn't! So took it to our garage, he opened it straight away!! LOL! But they didn't work on what needed doing so recommended someone else, drove it there and then they couldn't get the bonnet open either! So it has been left to be seen to and fix the bonnet! More money going out! Called mum to let her know and she is getting a taxi, short brief conversation.
Hubby is away this weekend on his golf weekend with his mates, they play golf all day then go get drunk all night! So I have a weekend with just me and the kids...and I have to see my son's teacher tonight after school about what they are going to do next year for him, with his extra one to one tuition. I was hoping mum would have the kids so I could talk to her alone, but that won't be happening now! And I will be walking up to school too, so hope it stays sunny! They might even look into doing the dyslexia test next year when he will be 7....
I had my sister and her fiance down last weekend, was lovely to see them. I hope they work out, they are trying for a baby, have been for ages! She has loads against her, and if she loses 6kg in 3 months time they will let her go on fertility treatment for 6 months. I worry about her though. She went out for her birthday last month and ended up spending the night talking to an ex. Her fiance knows all about it and they still got engaged, so hopefully she has realised where she is better off!
And my other sister, well, she seems to be rebelling against everything! She bought a dress for going out in with the girls one night, and my sister told her if she went out in it not to bend down! And to be careful as it said she was only out for one thing! Yet her hubby said she could go out in it! I just don't get him?! Or maybe he has had enough fighting with her? Or wants her to go off with someone so he can divorce her and get the kids? Who knows?! Now my sister tells me she may be flirting with someone we once knew as kids! She needs a good slap I think!!
Well, think that is my essay over for this month! Will see what next month brings....divorce on? moving back? Wedding? Baby?!!! lol!
Oh, and I stopped atkins as it just didn't work for me!!! I have decided to eat sensible, smaller portions, and do some exercise....starting with walking to school! And I got a 12ft trampoline off ebay to jump up and down on! Only problem is my weak bladder....may have to get that seen too **blush**
Flat was sold...stc, last week, hurrah! Then my dad was going on about getting a solicitor, as he didn't think he should be giving mum any from it as it was left to him in his dad's will.....Then he wanted to get back with her, though admitted he felt more for he/she (was a man, op, now woman) than he did for her.
After a rough week, and one where she has being saying it was the right thing to do, move here, settled, and getting on with life, the flat selling like it did when there are 5 other flats in the building that have been on the market far longer, she rang last night to say she was going up to see him....and probably will stay with him. The divorce is off again. The flat sale is on hold as the woman is ill. She still loves him....WHAT???!!!!???? I told her she is mad, she said everyone says she is but she still loves him, the man who has cheated countless times on her, who goes out and gets his kicks cottaging, who admitted he feels more for a he/she who has no sex drive, who only wants her for her benefit money! ARGHH!! It makes me sick and mad. I was so cross with her last night after she called.
I was supposed to take her to the station this morning, and was going early so I could talk to her, see what was going on in her head, but on the way home from taking my son to school the car broke down! So RAC came out, and it started straight away! TYPICAL! He did a check, and something was flashing as having an error, so he went to open bonnet and couldn't! So took it to our garage, he opened it straight away!! LOL! But they didn't work on what needed doing so recommended someone else, drove it there and then they couldn't get the bonnet open either! So it has been left to be seen to and fix the bonnet! More money going out! Called mum to let her know and she is getting a taxi, short brief conversation.
Hubby is away this weekend on his golf weekend with his mates, they play golf all day then go get drunk all night! So I have a weekend with just me and the kids...and I have to see my son's teacher tonight after school about what they are going to do next year for him, with his extra one to one tuition. I was hoping mum would have the kids so I could talk to her alone, but that won't be happening now! And I will be walking up to school too, so hope it stays sunny! They might even look into doing the dyslexia test next year when he will be 7....
I had my sister and her fiance down last weekend, was lovely to see them. I hope they work out, they are trying for a baby, have been for ages! She has loads against her, and if she loses 6kg in 3 months time they will let her go on fertility treatment for 6 months. I worry about her though. She went out for her birthday last month and ended up spending the night talking to an ex. Her fiance knows all about it and they still got engaged, so hopefully she has realised where she is better off!
And my other sister, well, she seems to be rebelling against everything! She bought a dress for going out in with the girls one night, and my sister told her if she went out in it not to bend down! And to be careful as it said she was only out for one thing! Yet her hubby said she could go out in it! I just don't get him?! Or maybe he has had enough fighting with her? Or wants her to go off with someone so he can divorce her and get the kids? Who knows?! Now my sister tells me she may be flirting with someone we once knew as kids! She needs a good slap I think!!
Well, think that is my essay over for this month! Will see what next month brings....divorce on? moving back? Wedding? Baby?!!! lol!
Oh, and I stopped atkins as it just didn't work for me!!! I have decided to eat sensible, smaller portions, and do some exercise....starting with walking to school! And I got a 12ft trampoline off ebay to jump up and down on! Only problem is my weak bladder....may have to get that seen too **blush**
Wednesday 24 June 2009
Quick update
Not much happening really...still feel a bit crappy! I have started doing Atkins....just into my 2nd week! Nearly given up 3 times! But going to stick with it, for a bit, and see if I do feel the benefit's... Get rid of the carb cravings .... mmmm fresh bread! LOL! We shall see! Lost 2lb the first week, though since getting the book, I read I have eaten couple of things I shouldn't have! So starting 'properly' this week!
Mum still happy, dad's flat is on the market, so hoping it sells soon and she gets her share!
Right, only brief as little one wants lunch!
Mum still happy, dad's flat is on the market, so hoping it sells soon and she gets her share!
Right, only brief as little one wants lunch!
Thursday 4 June 2009
Another month goes by...
And I am back to where I was last time I posted!
I did go see about a decrease, explained how bad I got around totm, and so we decided to decrease to 10mg for 2 weeks then go up to 20mg when I needed them.... so far....not so good! Think I decreased to 10mg for a week then went back upto 20mg! Will give it another go and see how I get on....
Had a run in with a stupid yummy mummy yesterday. On the school run, I parked up and mum got out to get my son while I waited in the car in case anyone wanted me to move (I was blocking a drive, though it only had a camper van in so didn't think they would mind!) I look out the window to see her (with baby seat in arm) mouthing something and looking like thunder....I turn off the radio and wind down the window....'You've HIT my car!!!' ..... ?! ..... At this point I am thinking, how? I havn't felt a thing, I know I got close, so I didn't block 2 drives, but I surly would have felt it?! From my dumbfounded look, she repeats herself and says get out and have a look! I get out feeling stupid, how could I have not known!?! and sure enough my bumber is nose to nose with her number plate.....I am very very confused now....we have a tow bar.....where is it?!!! 'LOOK! move your car and lets see what damage you have done!'.....me scurrying back and moving car as mum and son head back towards us....yummy mummy talks to her daughter (who is in my sons class!!) and then we look....not a scratch! Not a MARK! She has a huge 4x4 and the tow bar had gone underneath it! At some point in my humiliation, I had mentioned I didn't feel a thing and couldn't understand it, and I was sorry, and now, here I was, vindicated, yes, I may have been bumber to bumper, but no damage was done and it wasn't as if I had left the car so she couldn't get out!!! She inspected it, made some comment about how her hubby would have killed her as it is a NEW CAR and next time I should be more careful!!! I scurry off getting my kids into the car, and shout at my son that I don't want to talk, I just want to leave, and scoot off leaving her gloating with friends on the opposite side, who have witnessed the whole sorry affair. I am really mad, my mum makes excuses for her, it's her hormones, she has just had a baby...yes, in January!!!! ARRRRGGGHHHH! I am mad for not standing up more for myself and allowing her to tell me to drive more carefully and bow and scrap saying sorry when I had done nothing wrong! I don't want to go pick him up tonight, but I have just remembered he is out later, got choir practice, so I should not meet her again....until tomorrow. I hate school runs!!!
On the home front, mum is now getting divorced....yes, it's back on! He is sleeping around, admitted it to her, so she has seen sense and is letting go....hurrrrraaaaaahhhhhhh! She is making loads of new friends, and there are a few possible future hubbys out there for her too LOL!
Right, I am off to make some lunch and veg out and catch up on tv....that's all I feel like doing so that's all I am going to do! (Famous last words, will see the mess downstairs and end up cleaning and sorting washing etc etc.....)
I did go see about a decrease, explained how bad I got around totm, and so we decided to decrease to 10mg for 2 weeks then go up to 20mg when I needed them.... so far....not so good! Think I decreased to 10mg for a week then went back upto 20mg! Will give it another go and see how I get on....
Had a run in with a stupid yummy mummy yesterday. On the school run, I parked up and mum got out to get my son while I waited in the car in case anyone wanted me to move (I was blocking a drive, though it only had a camper van in so didn't think they would mind!) I look out the window to see her (with baby seat in arm) mouthing something and looking like thunder....I turn off the radio and wind down the window....'You've HIT my car!!!' ..... ?! ..... At this point I am thinking, how? I havn't felt a thing, I know I got close, so I didn't block 2 drives, but I surly would have felt it?! From my dumbfounded look, she repeats herself and says get out and have a look! I get out feeling stupid, how could I have not known!?! and sure enough my bumber is nose to nose with her number plate.....I am very very confused now....we have a tow bar.....where is it?!!! 'LOOK! move your car and lets see what damage you have done!'.....me scurrying back and moving car as mum and son head back towards us....yummy mummy talks to her daughter (who is in my sons class!!) and then we look....not a scratch! Not a MARK! She has a huge 4x4 and the tow bar had gone underneath it! At some point in my humiliation, I had mentioned I didn't feel a thing and couldn't understand it, and I was sorry, and now, here I was, vindicated, yes, I may have been bumber to bumper, but no damage was done and it wasn't as if I had left the car so she couldn't get out!!! She inspected it, made some comment about how her hubby would have killed her as it is a NEW CAR and next time I should be more careful!!! I scurry off getting my kids into the car, and shout at my son that I don't want to talk, I just want to leave, and scoot off leaving her gloating with friends on the opposite side, who have witnessed the whole sorry affair. I am really mad, my mum makes excuses for her, it's her hormones, she has just had a baby...yes, in January!!!! ARRRRGGGHHHH! I am mad for not standing up more for myself and allowing her to tell me to drive more carefully and bow and scrap saying sorry when I had done nothing wrong! I don't want to go pick him up tonight, but I have just remembered he is out later, got choir practice, so I should not meet her again....until tomorrow. I hate school runs!!!
On the home front, mum is now getting divorced....yes, it's back on! He is sleeping around, admitted it to her, so she has seen sense and is letting go....hurrrrraaaaaahhhhhhh! She is making loads of new friends, and there are a few possible future hubbys out there for her too LOL!
Right, I am off to make some lunch and veg out and catch up on tv....that's all I feel like doing so that's all I am going to do! (Famous last words, will see the mess downstairs and end up cleaning and sorting washing etc etc.....)
Thursday 7 May 2009
That wonderful time of the month again....
Yes, that's it, it's the time I seem to go into melt down, sick of it all and everybody! All because of a period! I wish men could go through it just once to see what it is like...just once! Argh!
Really can't be bothered. I was going to make an appointment to see the doc about going down in strength on my meds, then this rolls around and I think I need an increase not decrease!!!
And now I am welling up in tears! What is going on! Hubby just called, asked what was wrong 'are you depressed?', so I say it's nothing, time of the month, and he goes oh, you've got this and that so why are you depressed...bla-de-bla....really, just please let them go thorough it once, just once is all I ask.....!!
I just want to hide away. But I can't, life goes on, jobs need doing, sitting here doesn't help things, when I have 101 jobs to do....
But I have no motivation to go do them. Today, all I have done, is get up, showered, dressed me and my little one, checked my emails, made lunch, eaten, taken mum out to a friends, picked my son up from school, popped into the shop to get kids ice cream, dropped mum home, came home, cleaned out the rabbit hutch (did I say we now have a rabbit thanks to mum?!) contemplated doing the ironing, and emptying the dishwasher but leaving it, then came here to look up places to stay for my sister when she comes down to visit next month....and I have now got to go sort out the kids tea, and then help my son with reading....not much at all, really. Sort out some tea for us and bath the kids before getting them to bed, hopefully at a decent hour tonight, not 1am like last night!
I can feel a migraine coming on too....joy ......
Really can't be bothered. I was going to make an appointment to see the doc about going down in strength on my meds, then this rolls around and I think I need an increase not decrease!!!
And now I am welling up in tears! What is going on! Hubby just called, asked what was wrong 'are you depressed?', so I say it's nothing, time of the month, and he goes oh, you've got this and that so why are you depressed...bla-de-bla....really, just please let them go thorough it once, just once is all I ask.....!!
I just want to hide away. But I can't, life goes on, jobs need doing, sitting here doesn't help things, when I have 101 jobs to do....
But I have no motivation to go do them. Today, all I have done, is get up, showered, dressed me and my little one, checked my emails, made lunch, eaten, taken mum out to a friends, picked my son up from school, popped into the shop to get kids ice cream, dropped mum home, came home, cleaned out the rabbit hutch (did I say we now have a rabbit thanks to mum?!) contemplated doing the ironing, and emptying the dishwasher but leaving it, then came here to look up places to stay for my sister when she comes down to visit next month....and I have now got to go sort out the kids tea, and then help my son with reading....not much at all, really. Sort out some tea for us and bath the kids before getting them to bed, hopefully at a decent hour tonight, not 1am like last night!
I can feel a migraine coming on too....joy ......
Friday 17 April 2009
The Saga continues.....
HAHAHAHA (can you hear the insanity?)
Well, I have just looked to remind myself what I had blogged last.....No Divorce. How time can changed in 2 weeks.....
Week 1
Phone call, 'going home' - ok - 20 mins later phone rings again....tears 'not going now' .....ok..... 'Getting a divorce'....My response...'YAY! sorry but you know how I feel. What has he done?' to which I got 'I don't want to get you involved, but I have grounds...' HURRARH!
Appointment made, ironically 32 years to the day after I was born she is seeing the solicitor to get a divorce.... all done, paperwork being sent....he is not going to contest, has sent a letter stating his infidelity, so he only has to sign the paperwork, it will go through whatever process, he has to sell flat, pay off debts (joint) and then split what is left..... Finally, we are getting there.
Week 2
Spoke, yet again, too soon.
I am sick with flu, haven't been out of bed for nearly 4 days when she comes round to help with the kids, as hubby is back to work....round at 4.30pm, sorts out kids tea, brings some beef she has cooked, asked if I wanted mine, and I wasn't really hungry. Then says 'I am getting a train at 6pm'......OH?! 'Where are you staying?'....asked tentatively while saying in my had 'not dad's not dads....' 'With Ann' ....... phew! Ok, so she is going, fare enough, she has missed her friends and my sisters and her grand kids up there....this is ok.....
Sister texts, she had dad round last night, telling her they are no longer getting a divorce, to keep her nose out and don't tell anyone! HE doesn't want to sell the flat. MONEY! It comes down to money, not love, feeling remorse, guilt...no, money!!!! He is picking mum up tonight and putting her up for the night.......
ARRRHHHGGGGGHHHHH! We have both had it now. She is going to have them round tomorrow and tell them a few home truths....
That didn't go too well, well, that is an understatement. He really is a piece of work. He called my sister Evil, said she had an evil streak and was an attention seeker and never did half the stuff she has done for attention (suicide attempts etc - for example, when she was 10 she took her 1st od, we ended up in family counselling, and he couldn't even remember it!!!) and that she wasn't part of his side of the family...that's my grandparents who died last year who were more like parents to us. Wouldn't say why he no longer wanted divorce, just said he loved mum....she said how can you call it love or a marriage, when you go out shagging around, and 3 weeks after she leaves you are in bed with another man?!! After much arguing, it seems she got no where. They are still together, as far as I know she is still staying at his, and she hasn't been in contact since my sister told her we all know they not getting divorce now and she is staying with him.....
Still feel crap, ache all over, get worn out doing tiny things, and hubby thinks I have just got a cold and to get on with it...'I went to work, did some labouring helping build an office....' MEN!
We also found out this week that he is going to be a Grandad!!! HAHAHA! Does that make me a step-grandma?! At 32 is that even possible? Yep, suppose it is! YIKES! His daughter is 3 months gone. He and her mum wanted her to get abortion...'she has limitations if she has it' Crap came out... I totally disagree with abortion. If, and she doesn't, she felt that way, I would have said, have it, and get it adopted, or I would take care of it, rather than abortion. So, my kids are going to be an auntie and uncle at the end of the year.....
Tell you, you couldn't make it up could you?
Well, I have just looked to remind myself what I had blogged last.....No Divorce. How time can changed in 2 weeks.....
Week 1
Phone call, 'going home' - ok - 20 mins later phone rings again....tears 'not going now' .....ok..... 'Getting a divorce'....My response...'YAY! sorry but you know how I feel. What has he done?' to which I got 'I don't want to get you involved, but I have grounds...' HURRARH!
Appointment made, ironically 32 years to the day after I was born she is seeing the solicitor to get a divorce.... all done, paperwork being sent....he is not going to contest, has sent a letter stating his infidelity, so he only has to sign the paperwork, it will go through whatever process, he has to sell flat, pay off debts (joint) and then split what is left..... Finally, we are getting there.
Week 2
Spoke, yet again, too soon.
I am sick with flu, haven't been out of bed for nearly 4 days when she comes round to help with the kids, as hubby is back to work....round at 4.30pm, sorts out kids tea, brings some beef she has cooked, asked if I wanted mine, and I wasn't really hungry. Then says 'I am getting a train at 6pm'......OH?! 'Where are you staying?'....asked tentatively while saying in my had 'not dad's not dads....' 'With Ann' ....... phew! Ok, so she is going, fare enough, she has missed her friends and my sisters and her grand kids up there....this is ok.....
Sister texts, she had dad round last night, telling her they are no longer getting a divorce, to keep her nose out and don't tell anyone! HE doesn't want to sell the flat. MONEY! It comes down to money, not love, feeling remorse, guilt...no, money!!!! He is picking mum up tonight and putting her up for the night.......
ARRRHHHGGGGGHHHHH! We have both had it now. She is going to have them round tomorrow and tell them a few home truths....
That didn't go too well, well, that is an understatement. He really is a piece of work. He called my sister Evil, said she had an evil streak and was an attention seeker and never did half the stuff she has done for attention (suicide attempts etc - for example, when she was 10 she took her 1st od, we ended up in family counselling, and he couldn't even remember it!!!) and that she wasn't part of his side of the family...that's my grandparents who died last year who were more like parents to us. Wouldn't say why he no longer wanted divorce, just said he loved mum....she said how can you call it love or a marriage, when you go out shagging around, and 3 weeks after she leaves you are in bed with another man?!! After much arguing, it seems she got no where. They are still together, as far as I know she is still staying at his, and she hasn't been in contact since my sister told her we all know they not getting divorce now and she is staying with him.....
Still feel crap, ache all over, get worn out doing tiny things, and hubby thinks I have just got a cold and to get on with it...'I went to work, did some labouring helping build an office....' MEN!
We also found out this week that he is going to be a Grandad!!! HAHAHA! Does that make me a step-grandma?! At 32 is that even possible? Yep, suppose it is! YIKES! His daughter is 3 months gone. He and her mum wanted her to get abortion...'she has limitations if she has it' Crap came out... I totally disagree with abortion. If, and she doesn't, she felt that way, I would have said, have it, and get it adopted, or I would take care of it, rather than abortion. So, my kids are going to be an auntie and uncle at the end of the year.....
Tell you, you couldn't make it up could you?
Friday 27 March 2009
feel like I am going insane.... :o0
AAAAARRRRRRHHHHHGGGGGG!
If doing that out loud all day would help, right now I would do it. but it won't, it would just get me carted off to an asylum! I seriously wonder if I am slowly going insane...
My mum is now not going to get divorced...arggghhh! They are going to give it time to see what happens, he says he wants no one else, is selling the flat and giving her half, and will eventually move down here as she is settled here. Urgh!!!
Hubby got drunk last night at a friends, called me at midnight to ask me to go pick him up, so after getting ready and standing deciding how I was going to get 2 kids into the car whilst one was asleep, I get another call 5 mins later, saying ignore the last message, I will be home in 10 mins... So go back to bed...10 mins later, no sign, so call....ring ring ring...no answer.... this goes on for an hour, and I figure he must be walking home....or is in a ditch somewhere. I am soo tired that I fall asleep on and off, and then decide if he doesn't answer when I call at 2.40am I am going to call the police....Where is he....outside, asleep, in his car!!!!! ARGH!!!! Seen the car this morning, as I got nothing out of him last night, except to say I had to take the kids to school, and he has scraped the back corner bumper, and there is sand on the front bumper and grill.... I drove his route to see if I could figure out what has happened, but can't see any sand... think he is stirring...so should find out now....
I think I am going to have a breakdown soon! My head just can't cope, I can't get motivated, I feel so tired all the time....I just feel crap...
If doing that out loud all day would help, right now I would do it. but it won't, it would just get me carted off to an asylum! I seriously wonder if I am slowly going insane...
My mum is now not going to get divorced...arggghhh! They are going to give it time to see what happens, he says he wants no one else, is selling the flat and giving her half, and will eventually move down here as she is settled here. Urgh!!!
Hubby got drunk last night at a friends, called me at midnight to ask me to go pick him up, so after getting ready and standing deciding how I was going to get 2 kids into the car whilst one was asleep, I get another call 5 mins later, saying ignore the last message, I will be home in 10 mins... So go back to bed...10 mins later, no sign, so call....ring ring ring...no answer.... this goes on for an hour, and I figure he must be walking home....or is in a ditch somewhere. I am soo tired that I fall asleep on and off, and then decide if he doesn't answer when I call at 2.40am I am going to call the police....Where is he....outside, asleep, in his car!!!!! ARGH!!!! Seen the car this morning, as I got nothing out of him last night, except to say I had to take the kids to school, and he has scraped the back corner bumper, and there is sand on the front bumper and grill.... I drove his route to see if I could figure out what has happened, but can't see any sand... think he is stirring...so should find out now....
I think I am going to have a breakdown soon! My head just can't cope, I can't get motivated, I feel so tired all the time....I just feel crap...
Tuesday 24 March 2009
Quick update before tea...
Feeling a bit numb/blue/exhausted at the mo. Seem to want to just sleep, do nothing, dream.
Mum is hopefully going to divorce. He is such a selfish bastard. Told my sister he doesn't love her, hasn't for a long time, but is with her to get her income support benefit! He has been on a 'date' last weekend, told her all about it, they had a kiss and cuddle but nothing more...she is lesbian!!! HAHA! How twisted is life!
My sister is getting more and more down, going to see the doc about help. About time, I say, though she missed an appointment just over a week ago. Silly girl! Hope she goes and gets her head sorted! She said it is no wonder we are so messed up as kids with the parents we have, a mother who put her husband first even before us, so that they would have something when we all flew the nest, only to be left the way she is, with half her kids resenting her...pretty sad really.
My other sister is moving into the top flat with her partner...hurrah! We will have some money coming in at last! She is doing well, losing weight, sorting out her diabetes so they can have a baby...just wish she would wait until she was totally sorted and in the 'right place' before they tried and failed and end up miserable every month...
Well, off to make my tea...though I just want to curl up and go to sleep! My diet is going down the pan, put on half a stone this past month...just the way I am at the mo...need to get back on track...but can't seem to....
Mum is hopefully going to divorce. He is such a selfish bastard. Told my sister he doesn't love her, hasn't for a long time, but is with her to get her income support benefit! He has been on a 'date' last weekend, told her all about it, they had a kiss and cuddle but nothing more...she is lesbian!!! HAHA! How twisted is life!
My sister is getting more and more down, going to see the doc about help. About time, I say, though she missed an appointment just over a week ago. Silly girl! Hope she goes and gets her head sorted! She said it is no wonder we are so messed up as kids with the parents we have, a mother who put her husband first even before us, so that they would have something when we all flew the nest, only to be left the way she is, with half her kids resenting her...pretty sad really.
My other sister is moving into the top flat with her partner...hurrah! We will have some money coming in at last! She is doing well, losing weight, sorting out her diabetes so they can have a baby...just wish she would wait until she was totally sorted and in the 'right place' before they tried and failed and end up miserable every month...
Well, off to make my tea...though I just want to curl up and go to sleep! My diet is going down the pan, put on half a stone this past month...just the way I am at the mo...need to get back on track...but can't seem to....
Sunday 15 March 2009
Unmentionables
The unmentionable disease has kicked in again, feel crap, and depressed. Wondering if it is all worth it again :(
Lied in bed most of the day, except to get up and make everybody lunch, surfed the web a bit, watched tv a bit, and slept. Got to thinking about all the 'unmentionable' things I don't put down here, and wondering why not?
Why can't I say it, herpes...there. I did. I have only ever been with one man, and still got an sti, how crap is that?!
My dad prefers to mess about with men, another unmentionable, or did I already say that? And how he said he had got my hubby off in a park loo before we met? How sick is that! No wonder I don't want anything to do with him!
I was raped. Another unmentionable. Just over a year ago now. Seems time doesn't always heal as I have been thinking more about it these last few months, though cutting it off before really going into it too deep.
There, my unmentionables are now out in the open....
Lied in bed most of the day, except to get up and make everybody lunch, surfed the web a bit, watched tv a bit, and slept. Got to thinking about all the 'unmentionable' things I don't put down here, and wondering why not?
Why can't I say it, herpes...there. I did. I have only ever been with one man, and still got an sti, how crap is that?!
My dad prefers to mess about with men, another unmentionable, or did I already say that? And how he said he had got my hubby off in a park loo before we met? How sick is that! No wonder I don't want anything to do with him!
I was raped. Another unmentionable. Just over a year ago now. Seems time doesn't always heal as I have been thinking more about it these last few months, though cutting it off before really going into it too deep.
There, my unmentionables are now out in the open....
Monday 2 March 2009
Not much happening...
Still got the stupid tickle in my throat and wake up sounding like a different person! Getting a little better these last few days so hope it could be the end...
The watch, I finally got to ask mum, and it wasn't my grandads! phew! She is settling in very well, has everything in now, the bed came over a week early, and the fridge freezer got mucked up for a week so was late! Feels quite like home now. Jack is going to stay over on Friday night!
Went to a wedding at the weekend, and managed to look half decent! For the first time I can remember my hubby said I looked lovely! Kids were so well behaved too, compared to the 7 bridesmaids and 3 Paige boys who ran amok during the ceremony! Made us realise how well they behave!
Jack was 6 on Sunday, and we went to Southend beach fair ground with 4 of his friends. Again, realised how well behaved ours are and made me glad to only have 2!
Not much else happening, still strapped for cash, nothing new, and still no tenants in top flat. Looking at getting cheap furniture in and letting it as a holiday let. Will work out well for us for when we want to go up to visit, just need to get some cash together to do it up, decorate and furnish it!
Well, not much else going on, so not much to report!
The watch, I finally got to ask mum, and it wasn't my grandads! phew! She is settling in very well, has everything in now, the bed came over a week early, and the fridge freezer got mucked up for a week so was late! Feels quite like home now. Jack is going to stay over on Friday night!
Went to a wedding at the weekend, and managed to look half decent! For the first time I can remember my hubby said I looked lovely! Kids were so well behaved too, compared to the 7 bridesmaids and 3 Paige boys who ran amok during the ceremony! Made us realise how well they behave!
Jack was 6 on Sunday, and we went to Southend beach fair ground with 4 of his friends. Again, realised how well behaved ours are and made me glad to only have 2!
Not much else happening, still strapped for cash, nothing new, and still no tenants in top flat. Looking at getting cheap furniture in and letting it as a holiday let. Will work out well for us for when we want to go up to visit, just need to get some cash together to do it up, decorate and furnish it!
Well, not much else going on, so not much to report!
Wednesday 18 February 2009
Ill - again!
Yes, got the lurgy....or a throat infection/flu that left me in bed for days unable to hardly swallow and sipping water even felt like razor blades cutting my throat. On anti-biotics now, which has helped me with the swallowing/ aches and shakes etc but still have a sore throat and stupid tickle that nearly makes me sick when I cough! Ah well, at least I am not dying!
Mum seems to be settling in well, just waiting on fridge freezer, which should arrive today, and her bed, which doesn't come until 2nd March...so she is kipping on the couch! Has stayed here, and is coming down tonight to stay while we jet off to sunny Scarborough to visit family, sort out the flat, etc, then it will be just over a week until her bed comes! She had problems with the heating, but it is sorted now!
One minute hubby has job at the council, next he doesn't....getting sick of it now! Been told, had emails etc but nothing on paper....so still waiting!!! On the other job front, he is having a meeting today with the big boss man to get some things sorted out, see how the land lies financially, as things seem to be worse than he thought.... :o( So going from being great, no worries in a few months financially, to woe, what have we done?! Ah well, still have roof over our heads....
I did get a cheque for the ppi insurance I had on an Egg loan that was missold! Yay! Thought of all the glorious things I could spend it on....then the bills came in! Just waiting for it to clear... from £750 to £600 already as the bank I paid it into have dropped my overdraft!
I did something I wish I hadn't....like I always do! Looked at something I shouldn't have...
I have always, from as far back as I can remember, loved going in my mums jewellery box. I never ever took anything, but loved trying it all on, and just seeing what was in it....well, when I was up unpacking her stuff before she got here, I came across it...so had to look!
When my grandad died last year, all my brother wanted of his was his 'best' watch, the one saved for special occasions, rolled gold. He couldn't find it. I suspected my dad had taken it first out of spite...or it had been pinched by someone and he hadn't noticed. Well, I have found a mans watch.... and don't know if it is my Grandads. I really should ask my mum, confront her if it is, but then should I have been going threw her jewellery? argggg! Don't want to ask my brother what the watch was like, as don't need any more trouble there. I am thinking it is one of 3 possibilities...1. My dad put it there and mum doesn't know. 2. My mum does know because she put it there. 3. It isn't even my grandads, but dads/her dads watch. Going to try build up the courage to say something today, and if it is Grandads, take it up for my brother!!!
Still stuck in a rut with the weight loss....thought I would have done well this week with being ill and not eating for nearly 2 days... but no, I have gained! Of to start swimming again when I get back I think! Well, that is about it for now.... Got to go get dressed, been waiting for my avon order to arrive since 7.30am and still no sign... hope he hasn't had an accident!
Mum seems to be settling in well, just waiting on fridge freezer, which should arrive today, and her bed, which doesn't come until 2nd March...so she is kipping on the couch! Has stayed here, and is coming down tonight to stay while we jet off to sunny Scarborough to visit family, sort out the flat, etc, then it will be just over a week until her bed comes! She had problems with the heating, but it is sorted now!
One minute hubby has job at the council, next he doesn't....getting sick of it now! Been told, had emails etc but nothing on paper....so still waiting!!! On the other job front, he is having a meeting today with the big boss man to get some things sorted out, see how the land lies financially, as things seem to be worse than he thought.... :o( So going from being great, no worries in a few months financially, to woe, what have we done?! Ah well, still have roof over our heads....
I did get a cheque for the ppi insurance I had on an Egg loan that was missold! Yay! Thought of all the glorious things I could spend it on....then the bills came in! Just waiting for it to clear... from £750 to £600 already as the bank I paid it into have dropped my overdraft!
I did something I wish I hadn't....like I always do! Looked at something I shouldn't have...
I have always, from as far back as I can remember, loved going in my mums jewellery box. I never ever took anything, but loved trying it all on, and just seeing what was in it....well, when I was up unpacking her stuff before she got here, I came across it...so had to look!
When my grandad died last year, all my brother wanted of his was his 'best' watch, the one saved for special occasions, rolled gold. He couldn't find it. I suspected my dad had taken it first out of spite...or it had been pinched by someone and he hadn't noticed. Well, I have found a mans watch.... and don't know if it is my Grandads. I really should ask my mum, confront her if it is, but then should I have been going threw her jewellery? argggg! Don't want to ask my brother what the watch was like, as don't need any more trouble there. I am thinking it is one of 3 possibilities...1. My dad put it there and mum doesn't know. 2. My mum does know because she put it there. 3. It isn't even my grandads, but dads/her dads watch. Going to try build up the courage to say something today, and if it is Grandads, take it up for my brother!!!
Still stuck in a rut with the weight loss....thought I would have done well this week with being ill and not eating for nearly 2 days... but no, I have gained! Of to start swimming again when I get back I think! Well, that is about it for now.... Got to go get dressed, been waiting for my avon order to arrive since 7.30am and still no sign... hope he hasn't had an accident!
Tuesday 10 February 2009
Nearly a month!
Where does the time go?!
Lots happened! Mum has finally come to her senses and is moving out...and down south to be near us! She has got a flat, is on the train as I type, and has some bits already in the (unfurnished) flat that were couriered down on Sunday, has ordered a bed, fridge freezer, washer and tv to be delivered this week, though the bed won't be here until March, so she will be staying at ours. We got a sofa and table from the local Cancer Hospice shop, and I think she wants to go get a wardrobe too...
Picked up a cheap kettle and toaster and kitchen bin/drainer etc from good old Argos, going to get an iron today... Dad been a w&*%er and was not going to get the money for her deposit and first months rent, but eventually got it out on his credit card, instead of going to see about a loan! But she has to pay him back!!! She has been given some money off my Auntie to buy the sofa/kettle/toaster and bits, and then is going to just see how she goes on. She will get her rent paid, being on disability living allowance, and most of the council tax, so just has to pay electric, water and food ... plus tv licence and phone, and sky if she gets it! I will become her carer, which my sister was up home, so will get £200 a month to care for her. So thinking of giving up the Avon, as it isn't taking off...credit crunch and all that!
My sister, silly, silly, silly child, has made a huge mistake. Fallen for the flattery of a married man, and nearly ruined her marriage, not to mention his. :( His wife has gone lived, as anyone would, nothing has happened, just lots of talk, deep emotions etc which I think can be worse than just casual sex/one off. It has all come out, he told his wife he was leaving her for my sister, though he had told my sister he wouldn't mention her name! MEN! She told her hubby, who loves her to the ends of the earth and has forgiven her, and just wants her reassurance that she loves him back...which I don't think she even knows if she does... :( very sad state of affairs. Married man has turned his back on my sister and is making a go of it with his wife, blaming my sister for doing all the running, flattering etc (he is older) and his wife has been 'harassing' my sister and her hubby. Having not been in that situation myself, I can't comment on how I would react, though I would probably slap the other woman and chop of hubby's bits!! So I have every sympathy for her. Apparently, he told my sister a lot of nasty stuff about his wife, so she feels she has done nothing as bad as she has, and 'how dare she call me a slapper', but as I said to her, two wrongs don't make a right! And it takes two!
It is coming up to the Anniversary of my Grandparents, and when they both died last year, Grandma in March, Grandad in June, we made a pact, us 4 kids, to meet up around the time of their anniversary, just us, to remember them by, as the best, and only example in our lives after the revelations from my parents, of true love. Seems a bit weird after all that has gone on recently! Trying to get things arranged, I am going up there in the hols for us to get together, still trying to get hold of my brother to see if he is free, and then we will just go out for a meal and remember the good times! And hopefully get my sister's head out of the clouds and back down to earth and her family!!
Kids have had one bug after another, with a short respite in between! Currently, they are full of cold, but coping well! I've had a migraine all weekend, should have carried on taking my magnesium when af arrived! I have learnt for next month! Hubby is doing ok at work, and trying to get the contract finalised for the council work. Think he is going to do both jobs, as he says he can spend one day a week on the council work, and the rest on sorting out the paper, which could go one way or the other!
Still not sorted the flat, we are staying in it when we go up next week, so will see what state it is in, though we have had a letting agent go round and he says a lot needs doing before renting it out.... more money we haven't got! Any way, still taking it a month at a time, which I suppose is one up from a week at a time! We have had to sell the little Mazda MX5 as it blew its engine! Sold it on ebay for spares/repair as it was going to cost £800 to do the work, and we had already spent £250 to find that out! Made it back with selling it, and £100 more, so have money to do the shopping this fortnight!
Well, think that is me up to date! Off to sort out my washing, oh, and lunch! Then shop, and pick mum up from the station! Exciting stuff!!!
Lots happened! Mum has finally come to her senses and is moving out...and down south to be near us! She has got a flat, is on the train as I type, and has some bits already in the (unfurnished) flat that were couriered down on Sunday, has ordered a bed, fridge freezer, washer and tv to be delivered this week, though the bed won't be here until March, so she will be staying at ours. We got a sofa and table from the local Cancer Hospice shop, and I think she wants to go get a wardrobe too...
Picked up a cheap kettle and toaster and kitchen bin/drainer etc from good old Argos, going to get an iron today... Dad been a w&*%er and was not going to get the money for her deposit and first months rent, but eventually got it out on his credit card, instead of going to see about a loan! But she has to pay him back!!! She has been given some money off my Auntie to buy the sofa/kettle/toaster and bits, and then is going to just see how she goes on. She will get her rent paid, being on disability living allowance, and most of the council tax, so just has to pay electric, water and food ... plus tv licence and phone, and sky if she gets it! I will become her carer, which my sister was up home, so will get £200 a month to care for her. So thinking of giving up the Avon, as it isn't taking off...credit crunch and all that!
My sister, silly, silly, silly child, has made a huge mistake. Fallen for the flattery of a married man, and nearly ruined her marriage, not to mention his. :( His wife has gone lived, as anyone would, nothing has happened, just lots of talk, deep emotions etc which I think can be worse than just casual sex/one off. It has all come out, he told his wife he was leaving her for my sister, though he had told my sister he wouldn't mention her name! MEN! She told her hubby, who loves her to the ends of the earth and has forgiven her, and just wants her reassurance that she loves him back...which I don't think she even knows if she does... :( very sad state of affairs. Married man has turned his back on my sister and is making a go of it with his wife, blaming my sister for doing all the running, flattering etc (he is older) and his wife has been 'harassing' my sister and her hubby. Having not been in that situation myself, I can't comment on how I would react, though I would probably slap the other woman and chop of hubby's bits!! So I have every sympathy for her. Apparently, he told my sister a lot of nasty stuff about his wife, so she feels she has done nothing as bad as she has, and 'how dare she call me a slapper', but as I said to her, two wrongs don't make a right! And it takes two!
It is coming up to the Anniversary of my Grandparents, and when they both died last year, Grandma in March, Grandad in June, we made a pact, us 4 kids, to meet up around the time of their anniversary, just us, to remember them by, as the best, and only example in our lives after the revelations from my parents, of true love. Seems a bit weird after all that has gone on recently! Trying to get things arranged, I am going up there in the hols for us to get together, still trying to get hold of my brother to see if he is free, and then we will just go out for a meal and remember the good times! And hopefully get my sister's head out of the clouds and back down to earth and her family!!
Kids have had one bug after another, with a short respite in between! Currently, they are full of cold, but coping well! I've had a migraine all weekend, should have carried on taking my magnesium when af arrived! I have learnt for next month! Hubby is doing ok at work, and trying to get the contract finalised for the council work. Think he is going to do both jobs, as he says he can spend one day a week on the council work, and the rest on sorting out the paper, which could go one way or the other!
Still not sorted the flat, we are staying in it when we go up next week, so will see what state it is in, though we have had a letting agent go round and he says a lot needs doing before renting it out.... more money we haven't got! Any way, still taking it a month at a time, which I suppose is one up from a week at a time! We have had to sell the little Mazda MX5 as it blew its engine! Sold it on ebay for spares/repair as it was going to cost £800 to do the work, and we had already spent £250 to find that out! Made it back with selling it, and £100 more, so have money to do the shopping this fortnight!
Well, think that is me up to date! Off to sort out my washing, oh, and lunch! Then shop, and pick mum up from the station! Exciting stuff!!!
Monday 12 January 2009
Time flys
So much has gone on in the past few weeks that I haven't had time/energy to blog!
From what I can remember...
Finally managed to get little miss into going to bed at a reasonable hour - 9-10pm! Don't know how we did it, perseverance probably!
We are losing our tenants in the top flat...which is a relief! There has been one problem after another with them, the final straw came when my BIL went to take the paint off the bath (they had painted it and said they would take it off if we wanted, as it was beginning to peel) They were not happy with what is underneath. Granted, it needs re-enamelling as the bottom is like sitting on very very fine sandpaper, which is not a bad thing, and won't kill you, and we can't afford to get this done, barley keeping it together as it is! I said they could either live with it as it is not a health risk, or get it re painted at their own cost. Also appreciated they might want to find somewhere else to live. This is after we have aloud them to put goal posts in the front garden so their son can rip up the lawn playing football, erect a portable shed to store their mobile scooters in, cleared out furniture we had there, as 'they needed the space'. They are also running an Internet business, and storing their broken cars on the front drive and road! Heard nothing.... then got this, ' we have been to the local private council tenants association and they want to come and look at the bath, and also the huge crack in the ceiling in the front room. what do you want to do?' ....... WHAT?!?!?! I was livid. Sent BIL up to check on the 'huge crack' that has been there for over 30 years from where there was some subsidence, and it was pasted up. It is exactly the same.... he had words, asking what they were playing at, and if we wanted we could chuck them out for running a business from the property....and they have found somewhere else.
Hurrah! Just got to decide what to do with it now! Hubby not want to sell it, and in this climate it wouldn't be worth the mortgage! Thought about holiday letting, but it means forking out for furniture etc and paying rates etc...too much hassle? So may go down the letting route again, but pass it on to a company to deal with all the rubbish!
Hubby quit his job and has started his new one today, still as editor, and there is the possibility of a council job coming up in the near future, which would be financially better for us, but would it do his head in? I did think about moving back home and into the flat, but it is really too far a commute, and wouldn't do our marriage any favours.
We have all had the flu last week, still suffering abit now, going to go take some pain killers, think it might be a migraine, again! Seem to have had at least one a week this last 3 weeks...af did arrive though so thought it might stop them for a while...might just be with the flu...
Well, must go get my son from school...still struggling...but he has a review in feb so will see what they say then, and if they want to look into the dyslexia, though doubt hubby will ever accept it. He thinks the school is lax...I don't think it is compared to his cousins who didn't get homework over the hols and he got 20 pages! Granted, only has to be in this week, but still!
From what I can remember...
Finally managed to get little miss into going to bed at a reasonable hour - 9-10pm! Don't know how we did it, perseverance probably!
We are losing our tenants in the top flat...which is a relief! There has been one problem after another with them, the final straw came when my BIL went to take the paint off the bath (they had painted it and said they would take it off if we wanted, as it was beginning to peel) They were not happy with what is underneath. Granted, it needs re-enamelling as the bottom is like sitting on very very fine sandpaper, which is not a bad thing, and won't kill you, and we can't afford to get this done, barley keeping it together as it is! I said they could either live with it as it is not a health risk, or get it re painted at their own cost. Also appreciated they might want to find somewhere else to live. This is after we have aloud them to put goal posts in the front garden so their son can rip up the lawn playing football, erect a portable shed to store their mobile scooters in, cleared out furniture we had there, as 'they needed the space'. They are also running an Internet business, and storing their broken cars on the front drive and road! Heard nothing.... then got this, ' we have been to the local private council tenants association and they want to come and look at the bath, and also the huge crack in the ceiling in the front room. what do you want to do?' ....... WHAT?!?!?! I was livid. Sent BIL up to check on the 'huge crack' that has been there for over 30 years from where there was some subsidence, and it was pasted up. It is exactly the same.... he had words, asking what they were playing at, and if we wanted we could chuck them out for running a business from the property....and they have found somewhere else.
Hurrah! Just got to decide what to do with it now! Hubby not want to sell it, and in this climate it wouldn't be worth the mortgage! Thought about holiday letting, but it means forking out for furniture etc and paying rates etc...too much hassle? So may go down the letting route again, but pass it on to a company to deal with all the rubbish!
Hubby quit his job and has started his new one today, still as editor, and there is the possibility of a council job coming up in the near future, which would be financially better for us, but would it do his head in? I did think about moving back home and into the flat, but it is really too far a commute, and wouldn't do our marriage any favours.
We have all had the flu last week, still suffering abit now, going to go take some pain killers, think it might be a migraine, again! Seem to have had at least one a week this last 3 weeks...af did arrive though so thought it might stop them for a while...might just be with the flu...
Well, must go get my son from school...still struggling...but he has a review in feb so will see what they say then, and if they want to look into the dyslexia, though doubt hubby will ever accept it. He thinks the school is lax...I don't think it is compared to his cousins who didn't get homework over the hols and he got 20 pages! Granted, only has to be in this week, but still!
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