Last week, well probably for the past fortnight, I seem to have been going downhill steadily. Not wanting to go out, sleeping in as long as I can, though I have been doing that for a good month or so now...so maybe it's been longer than the last two weeks?
Still on my tablets, taking 20mg all the time now instead of going down to 10mg when it's not totm. And I don't know if it is really doing anything, or helping. Should really go see the doc again, but can't get motivated to do it. It would mean getting out of bed early...
I have been going to the gym now for a month, trying to go 3 times a week, hoping that would help lift my mood. I do get motivated to go, and have done an Aqua swim lesson, booked in again this week, so it means getting up and ready at 8am, and I can do it, so why don't I do it every morning?
Thought I was heading for a breakdown again last week, just crazy thoughts in my head, of 'I can't do this anymore' going over and over and over again, freezing and staring off thinking 'I can't move, I can't move' and really wondering if I should book myself into a phsyc ward! But then thought, no, if I am thinking that I must have some sanity! Seems to have eased off a bit, not getting those thoughts, but still wondering if they will come back worse? If that makes any sence? Not really with it.
Mum is getting ready to move back up North, off in Febuary as she can't give notice on her flat, and has to be there until the lease is up. She has given a load of her stuff to a couple who are getting married next year, going to sell a couple of bits on ebay, and the rest will got to the charity shop. I have (or will) gained a deep fat fryer, a microwave/oven and a small tv and dvd player for my sons room! Oh and a set top box. One sister is gutted because she has sold the washing machine and she wanted it! Which reminds me, I am also getting the dryer! So I haven't done too bad I suppose!
Ok, think that's my moan for this week. Off to go sort out some tea, or get a takeaway as everyone is out at Panto!
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